Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Sugar-a-holic not so annonymous

I'm back on this weight-loss train that never ends.  Unfortunately I've spend more time in the dining car then in the bike riding, walking, eating healthy car. 
Something I know about myself is when something isn't working I need a clean slate so I've deleted the past 12 posts and I'm starting a-new.  Also I have stopped the affair I had for years with weight watchers. I just can't go to the same meetings with the same information over and and over and over again.  They changed their plan and thats great but I just was not losing on it - not because it isn't a great plan...it is. It just was not working for me anymore.
Something I have learned over years of focusing on my weight is that I am an addict.  I have inherited this trait from both sides of my family.  Instead of downing beer after beer at night I'm dowing fun size snickers, ice cream, chips, popcorn etc etc etc.  Whats the common theme - SUGAR.  Beer=sugar, candy=sugar, chips=sugar (carby starchy right).  Sugar sugar sugar!  Just like a hangover after a nightly carb binge I feel just terrible, the next day I feel terrible so I have a donut with my coffee (hair of the dog right) and so it goes on and on and on up and up and up to nearly 200 lbs now.  Yes I am ashamed to say I am floating in the 190's up and down and have been for months - never going above and never going below into 180's territory.
So with this knowlege I have started phase 1 of south beach.  I know I shouldn't "diet" and this needs to be a forever change but I really need to reset my mind - to crave protein and good sugars from vegetables and fruits.  I'm officially on day 1 - yesterday I ate an SB dinner and snacks but had my last hurrah earlier in the day. 
I am excited about the next two weeks, I could be a big bummer about it and I'm sure I'll be hating life in a couple of days but for now I'm excited about the possibility of getting off of this stupid train and living my life.  So yes I am Sarah and I am a Sugar-a-holic.

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